3 weird features of men’s hobbies
If there’s one sex difference I actually think carries some weight it’s that men have hobbies in a different way to women. That’s not to say that all we care about is finding a partner, marriage, babies and ironing but there’s something quite unusual about how guys go about their hobbies that can be hard to understand as a woman…It is stitched into the fabric of the universe that there will be some things about how he spends his free time you’ll never understand:
1. Their hobby is the most boring activity you can think of. Your hobby is purposeful, artistic, promotes well being. His is (to an outside perspective) tedious and niche. My dad always used to collect model cars now I seem to have attracted a male partner that likes building model railways?!
Sitting in a small room, fiddling around doing the same kind of stuff for hours on end sounds (and can quite possibly involve) watching paint dry yet to them it’s an unending pit of joy and fascination.
2. It’s a solitary pursuit. The male art of ‘tinkering’ with stuff: computers, cars, Playstations is generally conducted alone. In fact the boxier the room, the further away the shed, the higher up in the attic the better. The vast length of time and distance from you equation makes it easy for you to feel neglected. To them though the normal time continuum doesn’t apply.
Beyond that door time is warped and passes very quickly. So hobbies always require more time.
3. The costs are always justified. Some clever companies have worked out the hold of the hobby on the male heart and have understandably cashed in. So when your Christmas present costs less than the latest addition to their collection try not to get cross.
The amount they spend is an investment into building something. Now you may not see the direct relevancy of what they’re building (getting to the final level on a video game, or having ANOTHER model figurine doesn’t always feel like a good spend). But to them the hobby is representation of their inherent:
Desire to build + investment in a project + occupation of an uncatered for section of their brain.
That’s why it’s dumb to compete with a hobby. It isn’t a mistress it’s a set of mechanics and electronics which actually produces something. It may not be something you can ever see the merit of, but it has merit.
Hobbies aren’t things that sociopaths, cheats and neglectful husbands angle towards. They’re a normal guy outlet, that its worth having a strict non-compete policy with.