Never ask her ‘how are you?’
‘How are you’ is probably the most asked question in the English language… it is also one of the worst.
So before you casually ask a girl how she is on Tinder, or use it as an opener on a first date, I want you to think for a second, as this one harmless question could be getting your whole interaction off on the wrong foot.
1. ‘How are you?’ is a HARD question to answer. It’s deceptive but as ‘how are you?’ is so broad it’s hard for people to distinguish how much information they should share with you. Should they tell you their day sucked, or will you judge them for that? This whole conundrum usually leaves people feeling like the only response they can give is ‘fine’… and you wondered why that conversation with her died out!
2. ‘How are you?’ is too generic. You want to blow her mind right? Well, then there’s no point being so unoriginal! If you want her to have a specific memory of meeting an amazing man then say something impactful instead.
3. ‘How are you?’ allows people to ‘hide’. Not ‘hide’ like hiding and seek ‘hide’ (that would be weird) but to go through a conversation without actually revealing themselves.
Conversations are a tool for self-expression and to find out WHO IS THIS PERSON.
So if you have the same conversation with them that she’s had a million times before, she is well practiced and doesn’t have to say anything unique to you! And it will be harder for you to get a sense of who she is, and for her to see how you’re different from the other guys.