Conversation Skills

Negotiating Difficult Conversations

October 14, 2016
▪ 3 mins read

Negotiating difficult conversations with your guy...

Welcome back to another episode of Love HQ where we do empowerment does love and dating. So if you are a woman and you're listening to this or if you're a guy and you've stuck on and you think that actually the messages about you need to catch and keep them out or how to find the man of your dreams are all pointing in the wrong direction, you're on the right path.

Fatalistic view

Joining me on the show today I have Sean from altershift. Now Sean is an expert in NLP. So I'm interested in what advice he has to share with us. So welcome to the show, Sean.


Thanks for having me on.


My pleasure. So okay, before we get into some advice- NLP neuro-linguistic programming, you're an expert in that. For the uninitiated, can you briefly explain kind of what you do and what that process involves?


Absolutely. So basically, I work with how the mind works and going through how you're thinking you can really change the results in your life. So oftentimes we have these unconscious patterns of the way that we're doing life the way that we're doing dating that we're usually not even aware of.

And when we go and we look at certain things that you're thinking certain patterns that you've developed over years, then we can go ahead and change those patterns and make them more empowering, so you can date even better.


Yeah, and I really am a big fan of this because I think that a lot of the time, you know, obviously our internal reality creates our external world. And unfortunately, I think with women, particularly how we've been conditioned to approach dating is cut into quite a fatalistic way which basically dissolves of personal responsibility or the ability to change. [...]

It becomes this thing that either there are no single men left or some men don't have the same standards anymore. Or men don't want the same things or you know that they just haven't been able to find the right person yet. So what do you think? Have you thought about the way that women's dating is language? And how do you think that could affect and influence women in terms of their thinking? How would you encourage them to step out that influence and actually recognise their own patterns of behaviour which are not leading to the results that they would like?


Yeah, absolutely. And that's probably one of the biggest things that I deal with is that fatalistic view of "I don't have control over my life". usually what I asked them who does have the control. So when in some kind of fate or destiny that people believe in. I really dive in to with their thinking to see how they think about that.

And when we can really analyse that and show them how they think that you know, if there's some kind of fate involved, if you have to wait for that man to find you, then look at the results in life and look at the other people that are having success in dating. And understand that likely they don't think the same things. were usually somebody who's very successful, they're gonna think it's more on them and they have more control more power over their life, and they can really take control at that point.


Yeah, and I like what you're doing there is there are an analogy and an overlay right in terms of how people might approach a different goal in their life, whether it's like fitness or you know, getting a degree or really good job.

You can listen to the whole episode below and learn how to navigate difficult conversations! And if you want to learn more about empowerment, love, and dating you can do so by joining my exclusive Hayley Quinn Club!

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About the author

Hayley Quinn is a leading dating and relationship coach, with 3 million views of her TEDx talk and 18 million YouTube views. She is spokesperson for Match, a columnist for Cosmopolitan, a regular contributor to international media, and has been published by Harper Collins (“The Last First Date”, 2022) and Simon & Schuster (“Do This, Not That: Dating”, 2023).

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