Body Language

3 signs he's flirting with you... and you don't know it

October 10, 2014
▪ 2 mins read

A view inside the guys' mind when approach women

I was out with one of my clients last weekend and one thing really struck me-Men are not flirting how they used to!

Think about it:

  • Guys are more cautious about expressing their interest than ever before. Trust me I speak to tons every week.
  • They aren't sure where their boundaries are when it comes to making you feel sexy.
  • Guys fear rejection.

This all adds up to him flirting not in that super sexy way you may expect instead he may just hint at it. If you're sat there thinking 'guys don't ever flirt with me'I bet they do, you just don't know it yet. As a matter of fact, I can tell you at least 3 signs of flirting you might have missed!

1. He engages you in a conversation on any grounds

Yup, if he asked you the way to something, for your opinion, or to network over something... I bet he likes you.

Guys often find it hard to say 'I think you're sexy and interesting so I'd like to take you on a date'. Instead, they get the conversation started and then wait for a sign that you're into them.

This comes from a nice place of them wanting to be respectful towards you. However often as they haven't made their intentions clear, you don't make yours clear either and in the end, no one dates anyone. Bummer.

2. He keeps talking to you.

So, his mate has gone to the bar. Or his mate is having an awkward conversation with your engaged friend. If he has the opportunity to chat with another woman and instead he stays TALKING TO YOU.

He's into you. Probably. Most likely he is trying to build enough connection with you so that it is OK to ask for your number. Again if he doesn't feel secure in asking- he won't so this is when you need to give him clearer GO signals.

3. He does nice gestures for you

Guys are better with actions than words. If he flags you a cab, walks you to the bus stop, offers to help you on a project and invests time in getting to know you he's trying to show you what an awesome guy he is.

You may not feel that lightning bolt straight away but hey this is usually a good guy in front of you trying to show you what a good guy he'd be for you.

So cut him some slack and give him some more one on one time to see if (with your approval) he steps up his game.

Men are everywhere (50% of everywhere anyway!) and they want to meet you, I promise!

So be smart, understand what's stopping them from saying hi and help him out!



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About the author

Hayley Quinn is a leading dating and relationship coach, with 3 million views of her TEDx talk and 18 million YouTube views. She is spokesperson for Match, a columnist for Cosmopolitan, a regular contributor to international media, and has been published by Harper Collins (“The Last First Date”, 2022) and Simon & Schuster (“Do This, Not That: Dating”, 2023).

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