You do you!
Most ‘pick up’ and dating teaching is badly wrong. So wrong that it teaches you ideas that only help you to fail with women! One of the biggest dating ‘myths’ I see is the concept that you have to do something, you have to ‘perform’ for a woman to make her like you.
I am here to tell you that this is absolutely WRONG!
You’ll notice this when:
1. Disreputable ‘pick up’ companies teach you that there’s a series of steps you have to take until she likes you. It’s almost like meeting women is a game, and if you successfully pass through the ‘levels’ out pops ‘the prize’.
2. Dating companies tell you unless you are an alpha sexy man – you stand no chance with women aka ‘there’s only one way to be sexy’ myth.
3. That women are by default hard to impress and it’s going to be an uphill struggle to get her to go on a date with you.
The problem with these beliefs is they:
1. work on the fundamental principle that you’re not good enough.
2. make you believe that meeting women is really difficult.
3. make you think that you have to play a role to meet women.
This idea that you have to PERFORM for women may be the reason you’re struggling to connect with women! It makes you think you have to ‘learn’ a lot of stuff before she’ll accept you… the consequence of this is normally that you just feel a bit neurotic! And get stuck ‘in your head’, so just when you want to speak to her you run out of things to say.
Fronting
Women also notice you struggling to perform by you ‘fronting’ and not presenting your true self. Then they get suspicious or lose attraction to you as they see whatever persona you’re putting on (the funny guy, the alpha guy, etc) as a sign of low self-image and insincerity.
Nightmares!
To avoid this you need to get used to not performing – yep. You need to reacclimatize to the fact that you are enough. You may need to improve your self -esteem, brush up on some communication skills, take up a cool hobby that you’re proud to talk of but fundamentally YOU ARE ENOUGH and not enough dating advice tells you that.
Related Posts
-
Are you afraid of receiving?Receiving and vulnerability Welcome to another blog where I bring to you a transcription of first bit of my latest interview. You know, a bite-size. This week I am joined by my friend Charles (more about him below) to talk about the feelings women have when it comes to giving and receiving kindness and attention, and investing in their relationships. You can listen to the whole episode (and many others) by following this link. If you want to share your thoughts on receiving in relationships, join Hayley Quinn Club and lets us know. The interview I'm here to revolutionise how you see love and dating and offer you a new solution to love. Because I think love is currently being taught to you in a way that actually robs you a lot of your power as a woman. Whether that's the Disney movies, pop songs, dodgy dating advice blogs about…
-
Should women approach men?Women approaching men Hey, guys, welcome back to my Attraction HQ podcast. Yeah, it's that time of the week again. Are you looking forward to this by now? I've been going for a while. What we will speak to you about today is a bit of a controversial thinking point, which is should women approach men? As you can see, I've got another woman in the room here. She's a very pretty woman, her name is Nerea and she's the founder of The Happy World Company. Now I met Nerea at a party a couple of weeks ago, maybe a month ago now. She's a really cool girl. I like her vibe. The interview The first thing that she talks about when she walks through the door today in my home is is she's done a video on YouTube. If you follow me on YouTube, you know I do something…
-
How to stand out more to menStanding out in the crowd Firstly, you don't need to change your DNA to stand out more to men. Nor your hair colour or dress size for that matter. There is a simple psychological technique that will make men approach you more. Do you want to be the woman who stands out in a room? Are you always missed out on in favour of your friend? Maybe you are missing out on the one item that makes him want to approach you. If he isn’t approaching you it’s for one of two reasons (and the second one won’t be what you expect): 1. He’s more attracted to other women nearby. OUCH (This doesn’t mean you’re less attractive. You’re just not standing out and you need to understand this is different). 2. He is attracted to you and can’t think of anything to say to you. Yup, thanks to 'independent womanhood'…