the natural touch

Women and The Natural Touch

The natural touch * is the key indicator of how happy and comfortable a woman is in your presence. When a guy shows no hesitation in touching a woman in conversation, he sends out one signal:

I am comfortable with myself and in control.

In case you’re new around here, comfortable and in control are two very big ticks for successful dating! And, just because you’re not a ‘touchy guy’ naturally doesn’t mean you can’t perfect the technique.

(*I wrote before on the topic of the touch. Read it here: Six Simple Steps to Sexy Strokes: Touch Women Effectively)


The Natural Touch 101

If you stick to these basics and practice, you’ll have things going smoothly in no time:

  • Start with light, infrequent touches, 1-2 seconds max, keeping to areas like her shoulder or upper arm.

  • Always stay natural. It is better to not touch a woman at all than to do so with shaky, sweaty palms.

  • If you’re worried, try going on a practice date with one of my wing girls until you have it down.

  • Move on to slightly longer touches in areas like her forearm before progressing to her knee or leg.

  • Don’t look. When you look at a woman’s arm as you touch it you seem like you can’t control yourself. When you don’t look at a woman’s arm when you touch it then you’re just that kind of guy. You’re not seeking permission because it’s no big deal.


Body language

That being said, the key to being successful here is in the body language. You’re giving out a very strong message and you have to be ready to look for the reply. If she hesitates or moves away from your touch, take it as a stop sign.

Now, respect that stop sign if you want any chance of her feeling comfortable with you touching her in the future. Being too eager to touch her can come off as needy so, back off and make an effort to build a connection. Chat for a couple of minutes and, don’t try to touch her again until things are flowing a little more smoothly.

Everyone will be different and if she’s a quality woman then be ready to respond to her signals or she won’t stick around long.
Remember, just because things don’t unfold quickly on the first date doesn’t mean they won’t pay off in the long run.

First impressions count. Most women will form an opinion of you in the first thirty seconds. Learn how to take your personal attraction to the next level with a one on one sessions!


Hayley Quinn

Hayley Quinn is an internationally recognised dating coach and founder of the UK’s largest dating coaching company. She has over 2 Million views on her TED talk and over 100,000 YouTube subscribers.

She is the spokesperson for Match, the biggest online dating platform in the world. She has been featured on BBC1, Sky and Channel 4 and is a regular columnist for Cosmopolitan and a contributor to yahoo!style.

Her first fiction book “The Last First Date” has been published by Harper Collins and her non-fiction book “Do This Not That” (Simon & Schuster) is due for publication in early 2023.

Her goal is to bridge the gap with modern dating and help inspire people to learn to love dating.

Phone: +447517915854
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